If I would've never left you - Chapter 1 - Crawling_Chthon (2024)

Chapter Text

There was a saying in Soul Society about returning of the quinci king, nothing serious as far as shinigami were concerned. During his exile Urahara learnt that quinci took the saying as a prophecy which was unsettling. It had become not just unsettling when Kurosaki Masaki and Ishida Kanae had died. Urahara had to be prepared for one more upcoming catastrophe.

Urahara had never forgotten about looming threat that was swinging above their heads, slowly tearing the rope it was hanging on. Not before Aizen nor after. Urahara was aware of the threat even during peaceful time after Winter War. Unfortunately he could never spend all his focus on the quinci king returning. Not long after Aizen defeat Urahara noticed new unknown force in Karakura. Too close to the Kurosaki to leave the matter unattended.

Fullbringers. Urahara herd about them but wasn’t allowed to learn anything more as they were Ukitake-taichō personal project. What little Urahara had learnt during the exile hadn’t been nearly close to what he gathered now when it was already too late. And the fullbringers were targeting Ichigo. That’s exactly why Urahara had never truly left Ichigo alone despite Ishin’s demands.

Urahara had investigated further and situation appeared to be much worse than he had anticipated. The abilities the fullbringer group had were terrifying, especially if stamina was the only limitation.

The worst one could affect even Urahara himself, leaving possibility to fully isolate Ichigo. As if what the teen was living through hadn’t been enough! So with the clenched teeth Urahara put his main project and preparation for a quincy invasion farther aside and began the work on a trap for fullbringers and a way to not to fell in one of the abilities.

It was a late summer. Before the Masaki’s death ninth anniversary eight months and ten days left. Urahara barely remembered what he needed to do and why, as if key part of his plans had been erased from his memories. Urahara was sleepless. Something incredibly important was missing and he needed to know what. He learnt soon.

Rainy night, somebody is staying on the doorstep, obviously soaking in a cold water. Urahara doesn’t bother Tessai or children who should already be sleeping. He comes to the door barely sensing the person outside. Urahara opens the door softly. Ichigo is on his doorstep. Ichigo, soaked in cold rain water, unhealthy bags under his eyes and fire in his look. Urahara curses himself internally.

“Esteemed customer, welcome in!” Kisuke keeps his act to the golden middle: not enough to scare off his Ichigo, but enough to deceive outsiders – fullbringers who have gotten to everybody in the shōten.

Ichigo enters. Urahara notices little hesitation in the teen’s movements. Without any pause Urahara goes into the living zone and then farther to his personal quarters. Ichigo follows silently. Tessai peaks at them questionably so Urahara signs to not bother him. He acts unnaturally but Tessai knows better than to question him to much. Both man reach Urahara’s room in silence. As soon as a door to the room closes Ichigo slams with his body against the wall.

“Kurosaki-san?”

Urahara talks to Ichigo in a way he used to back before Mugetsu which earns him a grateful look. Obviously, the shōten's residents were far from the only affected by the fullbringer’s ability.

“I got my powers back.” Ichigo rasps quickly like he barely believes in his own words.

Well, it certainly changes Urahara’s plans entirely. One more thing to account in. Urahara is a genius, he’ll make it work. He’ll do, for Ichigo.

The fullbringer group, Xcution, had a user of nasty ability of altering a person’s past. The evil twin of Shun Shun Rikka, in a way. So when the fullbringers appeared in Karakura to make Ichigo join them, Urahara was sure there won’t be an easy way to go against the ability. Most of the options had failed even in simulations and only few at least looked like they could work. One of them was to create reserve copy of the original memories and make them come back with some trigger. Ichigo in this case.

The first step of the plan was to awake from the fullbringer’s ability, preferably, before the quincy king would strike again. The second step included mod-soul in a gigai, some complex Kidō, Urahara’s own and Aizen’s inventions and some other things to deceive everyone and deal with fullbringers without Ichigo as a bait. It could be difficult even for Urahara, but all this effort spent for Ichigo’s sake was just a drop of what would Urahara do for him. Additionally, as a one big pros of the plan, Ichigo had to stay at the shōten or it’s territory to stay hidden for months and Urahara rather liked it.

“You don’t look good, Geta-boshi.” Ichigo says concerned a week later. He agreed for Urahara's plan and now stays at the shōten.

“No need to worry, Kurosa-”

“It’s Ichigo. I’m living in your room.”

“Quarters.”

“Not a big difference with all those wards,” - Ichigo trails off blushing.

“Had you lost your way once more?” Urahara fans himself lazily which looks ridiculous in the end of a cold autumn.

“Shut up. Who’s fault do you think it is?”

“Oh, don’t put a blame on this humble, handsome shopkeeper.” Urahara responds jokingly. After all, the wards inside the shōten were designed in a way so only close friends could get to his, Yoruichi’s or Tessai’s quarters using a sense of reiryoku. It’s just happens to be that all Urahara's friends, except for Ichigo, are master sensors.

“At least something in your words is true,” - Ichigo grumbles under his nose. Urahara ignores the retort for his own sake.

The idea of how to make Ichigo orient through the shōten came to Kisuke’s mind even before he had even considered a need for the solution. Sadly, if he would told his friends about this option, he would get long assessing looks from both of them then teasing session from Yoruichi and a lecture about consent from Tessai. So Urahara was reluctant. He was especially torn when he found Ichigo asleep on a floor after training: on one side, Urahara got a chance to carry Ichigo in bridal style to Ichigo’s room, on the other side, Ichigo had fallen asleep on the floor. Urahara thought himself to be a patient and wilful man, but apparently it’s not true when a matter was about Ichigo. Yoruichi would say it was obvious, if she had remembered Ichigo. So after less than a week of Ichigo's discomfort Urahara came to him with a proposition.

Ichigo often stayed in his own room meditating, not surprising after butchery his soul endured. Urahara wasn’t sure how aware Ichigo was in this state but he wasn’t probing his luck too much. Just a bit. Barely more than a ten hours of shameless staring at the teen in one week. Urahara had no willpower when a matter was about Ichigo. The teen - the exiled shinigami refused to call Ichigo in any other way than that in his mind no matter how many names part of him would came up with, just to maintain respectful distance at least somewhere. Especially when Urahara’s so called staring wasn’t just it. Ichigo’s power was always going wild during meditations and Urahara loved to stay as close to the epicentre as he could, if it made him hard there was no witnesses to know, except for Benihime. The exiled shinigami also refused to put concealing wards on Ichigo’s room too found of the idea of Ichigo’s reiryoku lingering all over his quarters. Urahara liked to tempt himself a bit too much.

Urahara enters the room. Ichigo’s meditating face changes slightly in an echo of emotions in his inner world, Urahara memorizes the expression. If he’d make a photo every time he creates a mental picture of what Ichigo’s doing, he’d already had a small library. Urahara moves closer and sits right before teen in an inappropriate distance. This way Ichigo’s irregular breathing tingles the exiled shinigami’s face and he can watch Ichigo’s eyes moving under eyelids. Urahara’s long accepted his yearning for the teen, but he’ll never act on it the full way, if the feeling made Urahara go for Ichigo even further than guilt then it wasn’t a useless or unwanted feeling.

Ichigo’s eyelids flutter and in a second he stares at Urahara. The teen blushes fiercely and jumps away flustered.

“Geta-boshi, do you even know about personal space?” - Ichigo squawks sitting at the opposite wall.

“Mah, Kurosaki-san, after everything that was between us,” - Urahara says in a playful tone keeping the fan out of his hands, he tries to be as open with the teen as he can.

“You can say it only when you start call me by name,” - Ichigo retorts and Urahara keeps his thoughts away from the implications the teen clearly haven’t put into the words.

“How vugular, Kurosaki-san,” - Urahara gasps.

“Go to Hell,” - Ichigo retorts embarrassed, Urahara noticed how the teen was carefully looking at him as if still awed by the expressions the exiled shinigami have been making behind the fan, - “Why are you even here?”

Urahara opts out continuing the banter.

“There’s a way to find my quarters through the Kidō layers,” - Urahara starts in his teaching voice to ground himself and Ichigo.

“Yeah, reiryoku sensing, I remember.”

“You need not to be a good sensor in general, Kurosaki-san, think about it.”

“And you want me to what? To memorise how specifically your reiatsu feels like?” - Ichigo grumbles embarrassed. Sometimes even Urahara forgets how smart Ichigo actually is. At least now the exiled shinigami will get something close to full consent, if he’ll get one.

Urahara nods simply to give Ichigo some space.

“OK. Not right now, but I can get fine with that.” Ichigo still blushes. “Now get out of my room, I need some time to think!” Ichigo stands up.

“How cruel, Kurosaki-san!”

“Out!” - Ichigo practically kicks Urahara out before slamming the door shut.

The next day Ichigo stays at the doors of Urahara’s bedroom in his spirit form. Urahara shoos away disappointment from wasted chance to mark Ichigo’s room in his reiryoku. What is he – a dog? Nope, that rabbit-hole is closed up hurriedly too.

“You had no need to come in this form, Kurosaki-san! Your body isn’t gigai so it doesn’t stiffen your senses. And even if it did, you’d needed to know how the reiatsu and reiryoku feels in your body.”

“Shut up, Geta-boshi.” Ichigo frowns obviously forcing himself to look Urahara into the eyes through the embarrassment.

He shortens the distance and sits in his usual cross-legged pose.

“You may prefer to have a physical contact,” - Urahara says without bravado or patronising.

“Why?”

Urahara sighs and averts his eyes, if Ichigo won’t give himself some space for embarrassment then Urahara will.

“I’m going to release my reiatsu while you’ll have to put your shields down.”

Ichigo clearly chocked on air. Had he thought he could keep his reiatsu as shields up? No, Ichigo’s smarter than that. Maybe, saying all this aloud was something too much for him?

Ichigo shifts, grumbles something incoherent and moves to seat on Urahara’s knees. That definitely wasn’t what Urahara have meant, he had been going to just seat beside Ichigo to provide support, but he will not say no to this. Urahara hugs Ichigo from the back for the waist and puts his head on a shoulder – may as well get as much as he can if the situation have occurred. Ichigo shifts a bit more.

“Kisuke.”

“Yes?” Kisuke is capable of keeping his voice straight and reactions hidden but that doesn't mean he is unaffected.

“Just checking. Calling your by Surname would felt like I’m in kindergarten.”

“Not something we want to happen,” - Kisuke chuckles.

“Now you.”

“Pardon me?”

“You told me you’ll call me by my name only when I’ll do.”

Kisuke hoped, Ichigo wouldn’t rise up this question in this position opting to finish as soon as possible. What a stubborn person.

The problem was Kisuke always had used a little trick calling Ichigo by his surname. The exiled shinigami knew enough Kurosaki to never imagine only Ichigo, but there was only one Ichigo, if not in his life than in his the depths of his mind. So Kisuke was forced to call Ichigo by his first name and he doubted he would be able to keep all his emotions from his voice. Kisuke had always been weak in a sense when a matter had been about Ichigo, after all.

“Ichigo-san,” - Kisuke calls with honorifics but he definitely have done a bad job at keeping his emotions at the bay because Ichigo shivers and bends slightly back in his hands. Deciding to indulge himself now and suffer lately, Kisuke continues without changing tone or keeping long enough pause: “Shall we start?” He doesn’t let Ichigo to respond using the question as a warning.

Kisuke barely releases his reiatsu, not even lieutenant level, but Ichigo chokes on air and bends once more and further. The teen have lowered his shields completely – Kisuke knows. It’s almost an impossible to do so to this extent because shields are instinctual thing. The exiled shinigami is careful with his reiatsu in response.

Kisuke memorises every Ichigo’s movement and expression. It doesn’t help to make his arousal any less subtle but he isn’t the only one so excited in the room, even if Ichigo’s mostly affected by his reiatsu. When Ichigo looks a bit more coherent, Kisuke moves to accommodate the teens weight and relaxes the hold on the reiatsu more. Ichigo jolts and straight away moans belatedly trying to cover his mouth. The teen leans on Kisuke and the exiled shinigami puts the teen’s head on his shoulder.

Kisuke breathes in Ichigo’s scent and pulls him closer. Gentle and cautious, only actions that could be explained as in the spur-of-the-moment thing. Ichigo is coated in pleasure obvious in the reiatsu in the air, torn between the need to shield himself to think clearly and the task to memorise the feeling. Kisuke breathes out loudly into Ichigo’s chin and lips, the teen’s breath hitches but the teen is too far gone to react coherently, the thought of Ichigo associating his reiatsu with danger and sexual pleasure in the same time is to sweet to take in a cold mind right now.

Kisuke as if accidentally brushes his lips against Ichigo’s chin. They seat like this for a long time. Ichigo squirms and whines in Kisuke’s hold but keeps himself vulnerably open. And yet Ichigo’s life isn’t in danger, hidden under dense spiritual pressure. Kisuke covers the teen more and more, slowly tearing of straps of self-control he keeps on his soul.

“Kisuke,” - the teen breathes out with a glassy eyes.

“Yes, Ichigo?” Kisuke pronounces the name with the same meaning as “my love”, unable to hold on his thoughts from spiralling down into the pit of his feelings.

Ichigo only whines in response and tightens hold on Kisuke’s hakama. Kisuke smiles warmly at him and concentrates his reiatsu on the teen making the one thrash in his hold and scream from sudden overwhelming wave. Ichigo is shivering and gripping Kisuke’s clothes chaotically unable to differentiate floor from stellar.

The teen calms as Kisuke rises back the hold on his reiatsu, more than three hours after the start, and nuzzles into the exiled shinigami’s neck.

“Kisuke, you’re an idiot.”

Kisuke chuckles and lets the teen to fall asleep.

If I would've never left you - Chapter 1 - Crawling_Chthon (2024)
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